Meeting a casual date safely: a checklist

Most casual meets are exactly what both people hoped for: a drink, some flirting, maybe more, and everyone gets home happy. The checklist below is what makes that the likely outcome. None of it requires you to be suspicious; it just means you're the one deciding how the evening goes.

The short version

If you only read one bit, read this. Ten checks, in order:

1. Chat on the site until you're comfortable.
2. Reverse image search their photos.
3. Do a short video call.
4. Agree what you're both after, and condoms, in writing.
5. Pick a public place you know.
6. Tell a friend who, where and when.
7. Sort your own transport there and back.
8. Keep your address to yourself for now.
9. Drink at your own pace and keep your drink with you.
10. Leave whenever you like.

Before you agree to meet

The aim before a first meet is to confirm the person is who they say and wants what you want. Four checks do most of the work.

Keep the chat on the site for now. Swap numbers when you're ready, not because someone's in a hurry. Police Scotland lists being asked to move to a different app as a warning sign of romance fraud.

Check the photos are theirs. Report Fraud suggests running profile pictures through a reverse image search such as Google image search or TinEye. If the same face turns up as a model, an influencer or under a different name, you have your answer.

Do a quick video call. Thirty seconds is enough to confirm they're the person in the pictures and that the conversation flows. Report Fraud warns to be wary of anyone who keeps finding reasons to avoid live video calls or meeting face to face.

Know what's been checked. Every profile photo on Local Slags is reviewed, but nobody checks what members write about themselves: age, name, job and location are their word only. Some members add an optional ID badge. Our guide to spotting a fake profile covers the tells.

Agree the basics in writing. What you're both after, what's off the table, and condoms. It's far easier to say over chat than in the moment, and our guide to saying what you want has ways to put it.

Setting it up

A good first meet is somewhere public, on your own terms, with someone else knowing where you are.

1. Meet somewhere public first. A busy bar, a café, somewhere with staff and other people. Pick a place you know, so you're not relying on their sense of direction or their choice of venue.
2. Tell a friend. Who you're meeting, where and when, with a screenshot of their profile. The Suzy Lamplugh Trust's advice is to check in with that person before, during and after the date.
3. Sort your own transport. Get yourself there and home again. Keep your phone charged and enough money for a cab.
4. Keep your address to yourself. At least until you've met and decided you want them to have it.
5. Agree a check-in time. If your friend hasn't heard from you by then, they call. A code word for "come and get me" costs nothing.

What to send your friend

It doesn't need to be dramatic. Something like this does the job:

Example: "Meeting someone from a dating site tonight. Name on the profile is Sam, screenshot attached. The Red Lion on the high street, 8pm. I'll text by 10. If I text 'how's the cat?' ring me with an emergency."

Most phones can also share your live location with a contact for a set time, which is handy if plans move on to somewhere else.

Public first, or straight to a private place?

Meeting in public first is the safer default, because it gives you both an easy exit. Going straight to someone's home is your choice, but it changes what you need to have sorted.

On the night

Drink at your own pace. Being tipsy isn't a crime; being too drunk to decide what you want, or to get home, is a bad position to be in. And it matters legally: someone too drunk to choose can't consent, as our consent guide explains.

Keep your drink with you. If you leave it, get a fresh one. If you or your date suddenly feel far more drunk than you should, or very unwell, tell staff, get somewhere safe and call 999 if it's serious. The police say to report spiking as soon as possible, because some drugs leave the body within 12 hours; you can report online or on 101. The Crime and Policing Act 2026 also creates a standalone spiking offence in England and Wales.

Leave whenever you like. Halfway through the first drink, before dessert, after a kiss. "I'm going to head off" is a complete sentence. Anyone who argues with it has told you all you need to know.

If you go back to theirs (or yours): text your friend the address or share your location, take condoms, and remember the plan you agreed can change at any point, for either of you. Yes to going home together isn't yes to everything that might follow.

If something goes wrong

If you're in danger, call 999; for everything else there's specialist help in every UK nation.

• In danger right now: call 999. On a mobile, if you can't speak, stay on the line and press 55 when prompted, and the call is put through to the police. Pressing 55 doesn't let the police track your location, so give it when you can.
• A member behaved badly or threatened you: report them through the members help centre with their username.

After a sexual assault, you can get support whether or not you go to the police:

The safety and consent page lists the specialist centres that can help with medical care and evidence, and the region pages carry local services.

Afterwards

Let your friend know you're home. If the person you met starts asking for money, gift cards or "a quick loan", stop there and read how to report a dating scam. And if you had sex with someone new, the free STI testing guide explains when and where to get checked, without any fuss.